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The one and only:)
PROFILE
I laike Manga, Anime, JPOP, KPOP, writing fanfiction (and my own stories:D), drawing stuph, and err I dunno what else:D FACEBOOKING haha. Yeah um and singing ? o.o Well I can't be bothered to put any more than that so..... Yeah if you wanna know something you ASK:D hehe.LINKS
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November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
April 2011
July 2011
THANK YOU
WELCOME ABOARD!
Hello Welcome to my first ever successfully created blog:D Muahaha. Wait I shall take down the date: 7/10/10.And it's the EYAs! :D jk I mean T.T hahaha~ ;D
disclaimer! http://www.blogskins.com/info/327624 :) Yay:D
my Mood in the Morning
October 23, 2010 .
Since I don't really have much to write today, I guess I'll just write the lyrics to a song I love :)
Snow Fairy by Funkist
Fairy, where you going? I'll gather all the light and shine down on your tomorrow.
Oh Yeah! Can you hear this voice?
Oh Yeah! Its Hoarse from all the yelling.
Oh Yeah! Until your heart can hear it...
Oh Yeah! Oh Yeah!
The moon and sun high-five.
Are you sure you're not forgetting something?
When you're not here to make me laugh
Even what am looking for can't be found.
Snowing, be honest with yourself and smile
because when two people lay close, time overlaps
Fairy, where you going?
I'll gather all the light and shine down on your tomorrow.
Oh yeah, emotions surfaced on the beach,
The season is turning white before I knew it even was orange.
Oh yeah, together weve watched a rainbow,
The seven colours now change into snow inside of my recollections.
If you laugh, its mysterious- I can become just a little stronger.
Snowing, you who is trembling so alone,
Is able to do nothing to come close by my side and surround me.
Fairy, slowly but surely youre walking your way, hang in there!
Cast magic on me who had forgotten even how to laugh,
You who changed everything with a single smile are my Fairy.
Snowing, be honest with yourself and smile
because when two people lay close, time overlaps
Fairy, where you going?
I'll gather all the light and shine down on your tomorrow.
Snowing, I could smile honestly because of you, because it was you
Snowing Fairy
I gather all of the light that you gave me and I'll shout, Snow fairy
Dont say goodbye!
Yay! :D Well it's actually J-Pop so please don't be disappointed if you went and searched the song on YouTube >.<~ It's the first opening of Fairy Tail and I love it so much wahaha:D
It puts me in a good mood, especially since I've just finished watching the third episode of Bakuman:D I love it hahaha, it gives so many people around the world an insight to what goes on behind the scenes of manga artists. The romance is so cute too, and in the manga the chapters are long, so it's not surprising that the author was successfully able to make the transition of character's ages from one year to another over a period of five years in only 100+ chapters. That would be a year per twenty chapters OMG O.O HOW DID OHBA TSUGUMI AND OBATA TAKESHI MANAGE THAT?! It is only now that the realization of their great accomplishment seems to dawn on me. And YAY, finally they have an anime! :) Hahaha.
I thought maybe as of now I should start talking about other, non J-Pop stuff so that people who aren't fans could maybe start understanding what I talk about, but my mind directs me in the road to K-Pop. I guess I'm just one of those really rare people who you see fangirling over both Japanese and Korean music:D Well, for Japanese, I guess there's manga and anime too, but why not? The obsession of music came from listening to opening and ending themes of manga anyway.
I realize that I have pretty much run out of ideas to talk about even though this post is so short :0 It looks slightly long already, but not as long as others just yet. And most of the space is taken up by the lyrics of Snow Fairy anyway :/
Sigh. What is there to talk about?
I guess if I'm feeling pressured and can't find anything to write on my blog then I shouldn't be writing in the first place, right? I'm not even in the mood to write a story. I was last night though :0 Damnit, I should have stayed up later if I had known that I wasn't going to eat delicious chicken rice from The Chicken Rice Shop T.T *cries* And after it already set up another branch in Johor, which is much closer as compared to all the other branches in KL... DAMNIT WHY DID MY FAMILY LEAVE ME BEHIND WHILE I WAS STILL SLEEPING D: NOBODY WOKE ME UP, DAMNIT T.T *cry*
I think I shall go call and complain to them now :/ I have no food to eat at home and I've been up for an hour and a half just using the computer for various random reasons finding something to do. What is this, do they intend to deprive me of food?! Starve me to death?! Make me go on a crash diet to lose weight?! Wth =.=
I'M SO JEALOUS OMG D:
See, this is the desperation one gets into when one longs for food. *checks the fridge* oh gosh, it's really empty. T.T apart from some unknown things I have no idea what they are. *checks the cupboard* no instant noodles in there T.T they probably went to Johor to buy some in the first place -.- sigh.
I FINISHED UP OUR LAST BOTTLE OF NUTELLA LAST NIGHT, HOW DEVASTATING IS THAT?! D: The only bread left is the-- oh wait no there's none =.= my maid must eaten the last piece I'd left in the packet last night.
Lalala I have nothing to eat and my stomach is killing me T.T I can't survive solely on water... SOMEONE SAVE MEH! D:
Ah well I guess there's nothing anyone can do about it and I'm just complaining about my own lack of improvisation skills, so I think I shall end this post now? o__o;; Seeyas.
October 20, 2010 .
She has two daughters, both of them are around twenty years, or late teens. They're really fun and nice.
I think she's a nice mother too. And she talks to me nice:D We talked about how she thought Twilight was boring and didn't even comment on the sick stuff and said nothing of the sort of how people my age shouldn't be reading these kind of books:)
There are some other things we talked about, like Facebook. And my generation of people.
Correction: My generation of IT-SAVVY people.
I must admit that there are alot of people who can type faster than me, use shortcuts I didn't know existed (which led to me being utterly fascinated by the efficiency of technology and made me pay less attention during ICT).
For example, I didn't even know Ctrl+V was Paste. How smart am I?
And of course when we think of technology we think of computers, and when we think of computers we think of the Internet, and when we think of the Internet, we think of Facebook?
Well, not really. All I see is a food chain:
Technology --> Computers --> Internet --> Facebook
So computers get eaten by the Internet? Nah, I don't think so -.-
Yes, back to the topic of discussion.
I realize that Facebook is extremely addictive -.-
And it gets irritating if you've been on Facebook for a long time (eg. you join during the December holidays, and have all the free time in the world to go online. Then school comes and ta-dah: all free time has vanished and we are thrown into the pits of hell, so we have no time left) and you are afraid to get spammed with notifications, especially if your social network on Facebook is HUGE (like 700 friends, which many people apparently have -.-)
I realize I'm using the -.- emoticon too much. Is that a bad thing? Or maybe my face is just really dao today. I'm supertired from House Camp just now. I never really intended to, but for some reason I was able to get back at Sabby for allowing me to be whacked during Double Wacko just now:D Hahaha icebreaker games. I didn't know the person sitting in front of me was called Sarah .__. YAY.
Sigh. I make no sense.
I wish I had more time today, tomorrow should be a holiday! After getting all the exam papers back I feel really emo because I was aiming for a 3.6 (absurd standard set by my mom) GPA after getting 3.14 in Mid-Years. Why, you may ask? Because I'm trying to get my first i-something object. In this case, an iTouch D: I don't know how people can be so pro at Bio and Geog and Lit and everything else, it makes me want to scream. Ah well whatever. It's always our own fault in the end though, why we can't score well in exams :0 Either we didn't revise enough, or we never really paid attention in class.
ALTERNATIVELY, we could shift the blame onto the teacher, which I am sure many people in my class wish they could do for a certain someone, though the name shall forever remain undisclosed online -.- Personal privacy, my friends. Although it must be clear who I am talking about, no? .__.
I want to watch Criminal Minds S5 now.... but it hasn't started yet. Oh, the joy of Starhub <3
OH WAIT! I went off topic and got side-tracked. Stupid -.-
Yes well let's get back to Facebook. Have I mentioned that it is addictive? o.o I think so. We shall get off that topic then. (Really, I think I've become bipolar over the years.) Facebook is more like... A creepy place where people you don't know add you, but then again it's a really important way for people to stay in touch with other people. Shall I tell a story? Nah, it's not sappy or long and twisted or anything, it's just pretty sad. I didn't emo over it though, more like I was frustrated and depressed. Or is that essentially the same? o.o
I shall use the name Person Z since I do not use X or Y any longer. Yes well Person Z (sounds suspicious...) is (was) in contact with me through Facebook and sms, but then I went for a camp in Malaysia, dropped my phone in the river (I jumped into the river, actually. AHAHAHA.) and got it spoilt. Sent it for repair and all the data went poof, naturally. Including contacts. Wrote on Person Z's wall asking for the number I'd lost, but got blocked on Facebook.
Wow. Splendid turn of events, don't you think? I was probably being irritating the whole while. How, I continue to wonder. Am I simply a bad person on the outside and at heart? I can't perceive myself. It's the other people who do. I can't tell, and that's scary. I can't tell if my efforts to be nice are futile and ruined by my actions, social status, race, religion, or anything. I can't tell.
See, that's the kind of things that Facebook does. It begins some friendships, and it ends others. Is it good? I have no idea.
Maybe I should stop thinking about right and wrong for a while, ignorance helps calm the brain and lighten stress load...
Post-exam spirit
October 16, 2010 .
With second thoughts, I reconsider what I just said and realize that I am wrong. I have indeed experienced boredom to a more extreme extent, to the point where I roll on the floor singing Fireflies and thinking of tents and camps. Yes, I recall that moment. Do not question my lack of ability to remember those which are useless memories and forget ninety percent of my homework instead.
Not like I need to hand in any more homework, anyway. It's the post-exam spirit settling in:D Jiayou for those who still have to wait for days to come before freedom greets them.
The fact that I am currently writing with "I am"s instead of "I'm"s already suggests that the lack of enthusiasm is causing my brain to malfunction. Maybe I have a loose wire somewhere. It's not impossible. *shrugs*
Once the exams are over, it's (YAY, a conjuction:D) as if there is nothing to do at all D: The day after exams was packed, and so were the days that followed that. Probably because most of the people in my group for Richardson Idol are in an extremely crappy situation in which we need to memorize the dance we are supposed to do on Tuesday and be able to perform flawlessly by then. If not we'd probably end up making a fool of ourselves, and who wants that?
I have been bugged to update my blog more often since it is after exams and I have nothing better to do, so why not? Ahahaha.
It's so fun chatting with the youngsters from my primary school (well, only a few hehe). I can almost relive the exam structure:D When comparing it to secondary school life, I could think of just about a hundred things I'd give up to go back to primary school, apart from the friends that I made in RG:)
Wow, I'm talking too cheem now, let's degrade the English abit -.-; Wah.
I feel abit weird talking Singlish on an online blog, and my mind can't even revert back to full Singlish for the time being, anyway. So yeah let's just see where my brain takes us:)
Today is so extremely HAWT!
I see now why Gray strips his shirt off all the time. If Fairy Tail were in Singapore, it would make a lot of sense. But then again, Natsu would be the one suffering all the time, right ? :0 And Gray would be fine, because it balances their body temperatures out. Considering that Natsu inhales, breathes, eats fire. Oh well, only readers of Fairy Tail would know what I'm talking about anyway, and I don't really know very many of them :/
GRAY <3 LUCY FTW!!!!!!!!!!! Ahahahaha:D I am really very bored. What is there to do? Practise the dance for Richardson Idol so that I will be able to perform better on Tuesday by spending more time practising ? *goes through the routine once, forgetting half the steps* ERICA HELP MEEEEEE >.< I need your expertise goodness T.T
OH GOSH. I just realized what a lot of crap I have been writing on this blog :0 Well, as a manga addict, I guess I have to take all the blame no matter what, yes?
I'm starting to dislike my name, although I still like it's appearance. Why can't it's original meaning mean something nicer, other than "Popular"? It sounds so unrealistic and egoistical :/ I think my parents named me that only because when they were given a choice of five names, this one sounded the best and looked the best, apart from one of the others that started with Z. The thing is, my register number would probably be last on the list. That just had to be taken into consideration, given that my mom has been a teacher for over the past two decades -.-
Sigh. I come back to the same question I have been asking myself for a while.
What is there to do?
Until now, after writing so much and squeezing my brain of all the energy juices it had been preserving only for emergency use, I still have not found the answer to that question. Other than Math sums, most of us can't really answer our own questions, now can we? I think sighing is the only thing that will serve to occupy me, but I doubt it would last beyond a minute or so.
It's FRUSTRATING! how much I'm dying to eat Nutella and other goodies but I can't because I'm down with a stupid flu that makes my throat sore and my eyes watery and my nose run like a tap.
ARGH WHY CAN'T THE STUPID THING PLAY ME A BAKUMAN EPISODE. DAMNIT.
I think I shall go and sleep now.
Seeya.
-end-
Tribute
October 14, 2010 .
* * *
It trickled slowly back into her body.
It was as if the hands of Death had turned into a leaking tap, one which was being fixed, hurriedly, by those hands. They wasted no time in trying to seal off the hole that allowed Life to crawl back into her still figure, broken and bloodied.
But with Life seeping back into her, the pain returned to regain its rule over her contorted, twisted frame once more. She did not feel it at first, only her dry, cracked lips and the lack of energy that had been sucked away. Then as a drop of blood oozed out of a wound and ran down her grimy face, she felt a little elf hammering away on the inside of her head with a sharp axe.
She could feel the bruises evident, hemorrhaging underneath her grazed layers of ashen skin, now reduced to flesh, burning at the touch of the gravel on which she lay.
Her eyelids were being weighed down, like the burden of every muscle had reached an intensity far beyond the painful leg cramps which she used to whine about to Rhia every time she neglected the water she needed to drink every day.
"How long have I been out cold?" she asked herself, and as the black engulfed her eyes, answered the question opened to anyone who was there to answer - but there were none.
"Must've been a day or two at least."
That would explain the extreme hunger that clawed at the pits of her stomach, grinding her insides and acidifying her body because it had nothing to prey on - she hadn't eaten for such a long time, it had felt like eons ago when she had last touched the sunnyside-up egg that Rien had perfected after a few days of practice and many yolks spilling over onto the kitchen tabletop.
That had barely been a few hours before she had been knocked out cold after a neverending fight with Slayden, a battle to the death that none had wished to fight.
And then it finally dawned on her that she was still alive.
Breathing.
She gasped for air, but the injury in her chest made it difficult to breathe. As toxic fumes swarmed into her mouth and flew down her windpipe she choked, but the coughing ended up shaking her entire body into slight spasms, jerking her immobile limbs by a few inches.
At this point, she couldn't even tell if she wanted to be alive or not. Would it have been better if she had just died, and left this world? But that would've be a selfish request. After all, it wouldn't do anyone any good, except maybe Slayden. He might really turn into a serial killer at some point.
But she decided not to think about that, and instead think only of the blazing sphere in the early afternoon sky whose rays struck her flesh like a dangerous spotlight. It made her drip with sweat, not making her feel any more comfortable than she had already been - now the shredded pieces of clothes were not only stained and filthy, but stuck to her skin like fresh glue.
The feeling was the same as when she first stepped onto the barren land where the volcano used to exist. All it had left in its remains were heaps of ashes and red-hot coal, the perfect luxury for a demon. She'd wondered how Slayden survived in there. His master didn't have any troubles with the heat whatsoever - it was how a human could have made that into a home that set her wondering.
If she could just lie here for eternity with a blank mind, and watch the changes in the sky, count the seconds taken for one cloud to come into her view and disappear along with the rest of the cotton wool puffs that drifted along ever so peacefully. Maybe in the winter, she'd get to see the Northern Lights.
"Please, Kaera... Leave me be. Killing my profile won't bring about destruction to your world..."
A heavy sigh she forced out of her lungs, and threw a blanket of nothingness over her eyes and in her mind did she. "Is she really planning on removing me, then?" But her suspicion grew, because surely even a young girl with deep thoughts such as her should have times where predictable things happen. "Yes... Even a genius cannot reach the peak of perfection, of which is like the stars compared to Everest." A ghost of a smile tugged her cracked lips like her heartstrings were being pulled back to the world by life's unbreakable threads. "That was what she taught us all."
... Step. Step.
... Step.
... Step step step step.
... Step step step step step step step step step step
Running. Someone running.
Step step step step step step.
Panting... Step. Step.
Step step step step.
Step step step --pant-- step step step
And the footsteps were getting closer.
Step step --pant-- step step step --pant-- step --pant--
step step step step
And louder.
Step step step step step --flip-- step step --flop-- step --flip-- step step --flop--
And her eyes flew open, just because the rhythm of the steps and the sound of the ever-so familiar pink floral flip-flops rang in her ears, and she a single thought ran in her mind, as though a security alarm had been breached.
In the middle of this dead wasteland -- what was Rhia doing here?
But she need not move, for the smaller girl Rhia had already reached her and collapsed at her side, head resting on her visible ribcage through the torn patchwork clinging onto her skin. Clear drops of water tingled on her skin, but they were hot and flowing like parallel rivers dripping from her large aqua-blue eyes.
For the first time in a while, she was compelled to move.
Reaching out for Rhia's face, channeling what was left of her strength into her right arm, she raised it, fingers daintily caressing her cheek as she shook ever so hard, crying. Crying in desperation for her best friend to stay with her, to survive her excruciating pain, and live on.
A husky laugh tumbled out of her throat, "Haha... Your cheek's as chubby as ever." and barely pinched the side of her face, dirt from her fingernails spilling onto her untainted skin, seemingly staining it.
But this time, Rhia didn't care.
Even when they both heard the new sound of Eizan as he sprinted wide-eyed in their direction, or when Kyler resoundingly called out her name to let her know he was there, before he took off for where they were all gathering at full speed. Sending her a hateful glare, Rhia's round orbs took in her face before grabbing both her cheeks in return. "And Sierra, you naughty girl, your cheeks are just as fat as ever."
Broken by sobs and the happiness of reunion, both began their long symphony of sobbing, crying, wailing and clutching each other in their arms, and showering all their attention on each other. Ignoring the boys, even when they got home and gave Rien the shock of his life, hauling Sierra inside the house. Period.
When complained to by Rien and Kyler, she merely answered with a cheeky grin, "It's what girls do if their relationship doesn't involve constant slapping and bitching about each other's bad habits."
After all, they had a perfectly reliable excuse -- they never thought they'd get to see the other's face again.
--
Such is the love I harbour for my dear friend whom I have bestowed upon the name Azeria. Weehee. Thanks so much for being my friend throughout the seven years we've been together, and hahaha I sound like I'm proposing. But I'm not homo, I'm not bi, and I'm not les. I just love the way we forget we were angry at each other and patch up by screaming at each other how hawt some random guy is or how cute Minho is when he's doing aegyo, and become friends again.
I find you annoying at times, I have to confess, but who cares? You're fun like that:D Never let the fun escape. <3
One day, I'll find a way to say "I love you" to you in 10 different languages. At this point of time, I (think) know how to do 7. Three more to go, heehee.
And maybe I'll add on an extra one for a guy I love ? ;D Hahaha jkjk.
Eizan or Kyler, maybe. But they don't exist.
You do. And I love that <3
It's not out of pity, but love and care.
October 07, 2010 .
I know being said is a bad way to start of a blog, but yeah.
Can I rant my feelings today ? >.<~ I'll be kind of obvious about it, so.
When someone close to you dies,
You find that there are many things to do.
Take a look at an old photograph, and smile. It's impossible to believe it. She can't be dead and gone. Unbelievable.
Get your phone and look up her contact number, and call. But you don't hear a voice. Either you hear nothingness, or the words spoken by another. Emptiness. Anger.
"Why won't she pick up?"
Walk to her room. Handle carefully the things she held, those which bear her touch. Her scent still lingers in the air, but it is faint, and threatens to disappear. Lie on her bed, slowly. Lie there... and stand up. Walk around the room.
"This is what it must have been like to be her."
Now there is no one else to do all those things. Think to yourself,
"Will everything be covered in dust, and be left untouch, for the rest of my life?"
Make sure your answer to that question is no. After this, maybe you'd be sort-of gone too, your heart closed off from the rest of the world and coated in a layer of dust, too far a reach from the caring hands which want so badly to embrace you and tell you that they're still there for you.
But that is merely selfishness of those hands. What is out of one's reach is not meant to be reached for, until it comes closer.
To those hands, when that opportunity comes, don't be so quick to grab it, though others might. The others form a sea so vast that it's impossible to know that you're the one who'll reach it. Amdist their struggle, just be patient.
Say it with your heart.
"I'll be there for you. Even if you don't need me. I always will."
And maybe two hearts will connect.
Life is irreplaceable, once God's taken it from your body and sent it up to heaven, there's nothing anyone can do about it, except maybe commit suicide. But that's just a sin in itself.
That one thing the dead desire for the most is Life. Why?
Because they want to say "sorry" to the ones missing them and grieving for them.
Because they want to say "thank you" to everyone who has helped them in their life.
Because they want to say "i love you" to those they care about.
Because they want to say a final "goodbye" to people who'd known them.
And because they need to show that their Life was appreciated.
There are always things to regret.
It's all a learning experience ? Nah.
It's something you learn to live with.
But how are you going to do that ?
Live on, I mean.
How ?
Even with her gone, you're not alone. You never are. Never will be.
You have friends. <3
And even without us, there's always her :)
She never really left you.
With her sacrifice, she'll bring happiness to you.
Who knows ?
She may be the one that ties the heartstrings of her son and his friends.
Now that it's happened, there's nothing anyone can do about it anymore, except to cheer you up. Everyone's doing everything they can. Even her.
There's no going back.
There never was, anyway.
It's just a life of moving forward, not moving on.
Move forward, little by little, with everyone you love in your heart. Leave no one forgotten.
It's not a race, but with that in mind, you'll win eventually :)
-end-